My boyfriend’s mom asked if I could draw an eagle carrying a set of scales to promote a social gathering for legal professionals. I like it when people give me unique ideas for things I wouldn’t usually draw.
Last night I taught a painting party at Flanagan’s Harp and Fiddle in Bethesda, Maryland. Our theme was a sunflower, but I spy a Luigi and two elephants!
Flanagan’s meets my ideal restaurant trifecta of great service, convenient parking, and optional outdoor seating. I guess it’s important to note that the snacks and drinks are great too. 😉 Needless to say, I will be back!
Resolutions are lame but here are mine. I am a day late, but yesterday my ability to look at a computer screen was decimated by a migraine and it’s my blog so I can backdate if I want. Here are a few goals for the new year.
• A.B.M. (Always be Moisturizing)
Seriously. Everyone knows that white people age worse than everyone else. Have you seen me? It’s as if a white porcelain toilet left out on the lawn is reflecting sun into your face while you drive without sunglasses at high noon.
• Finish Graduate School
I have five classes left until I can complete my M.S. in Marketing Management and have my life back. If I maximize my suffering I can graduate this winter. Then if I really hate myself I can take the three extra six-credit courses to earn an MBA. Either way, prepare for more epic poop emoji-related posts after graduation. 💩
• Pay Off My Student Debt
Prepare to lose a revenue stream, federal government. I am on track to pay off my undergraduate student debt this year. Seriously, take your 6.8% interest and stick it, because this year is my year!
Paying off my student debt will also set my Murphy’s Law plan of getting Bernie Sanders elected into motion, because we all know if I finish paying off my $25,000 in student loans, Bernie will get elected and forgive all of the student debt. You’re welcome, America! 🇺🇸
• Take Better Care of My Body
I’m writing this in my iPhone notes at the chiropractor’s office. Right now it is week one and my spine wants to die but it’s supposed to get worse before it gets better, right? Right?!? 😭
• Use Up All of My Yarn
Don’t be surprised if you receive a potholder, scarf, or similarly rectangular hand-crocheted item from me this year. I hope I know your favorite color.
I don’t have the literary aptitude that it would take to describe life as a full-time worker and part-time grad student. All I can do is sit and marvel at the basket cases who do both of those things while running a household and being a parent. I do, however, have the ability to make a lot of lists, since that is how I keep track of things now that the capacity for short-term memory retention has been burned out of my brain. Presently I am in Week 10 of “Finance for Decision Makers,” and on the cusp of losing any semblance of sanity I might have had, so here are the three most important lists in my life right now:
Things I miss about not being in school: -shaving my legs on a regular basis
-doing laundry before all I have left are hole-y sweatpants and granny bloomers
-cooking healthy food
-eating healthy food
-exercising to relieve stress
-thinking that I knew was stress was, but not really
-reading for enjoyment
-not feeling compelled to binge-watch Doomsday Preppers while longing for life “off the grid”
Things I want to do when I finish school forever:
-sleep for two weeks
-eat food that wasn’t sourced from a drive-thru
-go to Costa Rica and look at lizards, birds and monkeys
-finally figure out what is wrong with my car stereo (a.k.a., replace the car stereo)
-take more dance classes
-stay up after 10pm
-not have night terrors about cost allocation analyses
Things I need to do today but don’t have time for:
No matter what happens in the last two weeks of this semester, I am going to see The Book of Mormon on August 5th. I just need to hang on!
What are the things about life that you miss when you are buried in school-work and work-work? Dig deep, you may surprise yourself.
Because taking two classes and working full time decimated my creativity and free time over the past twelve weeks, I haven’t been sharing much. Here are a couple of Wine and Cheese party e-vites that I made for work. Which one do you like better?
As a high school junior from 2004-2005, I took AP Art History at Delmar High School with Mrs. Judy Hearn. If you really want to expand your knowledge of art and see the world and its historical events in a brighter light, take an art history course. However, I will mention the importance of having an instructor that makes the subject come alive and cares about your outcome in the class. They should care to the point where you wonder if they secretly think you’re retarded based on the notes you receive on the tests you get back. In college I took Italian Renaissance Art History, but my instructor failed to capture the magic and her class became my twice-a-week afternoon siesta (I still earned a B).
After a lot of scrimping and saving (at least on my family’s part), our class took off on the inaugural Hearn Art History Extravaganza to visit various locales in France and Italy.
I will never forget the feeling of leaving the east coast of the United States and traveling by air for the first time, and seeing everything we had spent the entire school year learning about in textbooks come to life before us. I am hoping that one day again I will get to see the Eiffel Tower and police officers on rollerblades in France, and enjoy a view of the Leaning Tower of Pisa in Italy after tracking down that restaurant where I bought the most incredible sandwich of my life in 2005.
November 1. I am thankful that I don’t work at my old job anymore. It was eating my soul.
November 2. Work appropriate skinny leg pants from The Limited.
November 3. My sweet Marc. Always there to hold my hand when it hits the fan.
November 4. Wildfire Adventures Fitness Boot(y) Camp! The toughest class you’ll ever love.
November 6. MY PARENTS GOT A POOL. Sure, they waited until after I moved 2.5 hours away, but did they think that would deter me? Even my bf Rebecca took the Megabus down from New York for this.
November 7. Whomever made this glorious painting.
November 8. Friday lunches out with my co-workers. AND today is payday!
November 9. I love nature, especially when I am camping in it. This weekend I am camping with friends from my college Outdoor Club. I can’t wait to relive the memories and spend the night sleeping outside in -30 degree weather. Really, I mean it!
November 10. My parents. Putting up with my B.S. for nearly 25 years now. That is longer than most people stay at a paying gig.
November 11. Thank a Veteran. Happy Veterans Day!
November 12. COFFEE. It makes my brain feel like rainbows. (Photo Credit: Deviant Art, LynnTattoos)
November 13. I’m glad to be a woman with a modern, career-oriented lifestyle. The pictured quote from Marina Abramovic pretty much sums up how I feel. I think the word “feminist” has come to have a negative connotation. Can’t I just be a strong and independent human being? What should my successes and failures have to do with being a woman?
November 14. The “Thrift Shop” song by Macklemore. Now I don’t have to live in shame anymore (Just kidding, I have no shame)! Thrift shopping is fun and it helps the community, not to mention that is satisfies my need to own cool things without paying full price.
November 15. I am reluctantly thankful for the Intercounty Connector. I have the same love-hate relationship with this road as most PG-MC commuters. The idiotically low speed limit and disproportionately high toll work together to quickly get me to work and separate me from my paycheck. Others may choose to rip their hair out on the Beltway for free, but I like to have a chance of making it to my 8:30 am job before noon. Intercounty Connector- Raping your EZ-Pass since 2011.
November 16. This is my ride-or-die 2007 Honda Civic. I paid for it all on my own and it was worth the struggle! I don’t know where I would be without my “mobile office.”
November 17. ART. Art, art, art, all day every day. Did you know that my parents never discouraged me from growing up to become a graphic artist? And here I am, all in one piece with food and shelter. What a world.
November 18. Yes, the people are snooty and the traffic patterns are monumentally asinine (see what I did there), but I am happy to live near a cultural capital with so many incredible museums and fun events. The town I grew up in has less than 5 traffic lights, so you can imagine my excitement.
November 19. I’m thankful for all of the time I have ever spent at the beach. I worked in Ocean City, Maryland for five years and it seems like such a lifetime ago since graduating and getting an office job. Here is a picture of my friend Nicole and I in the Assawoman Bay, digging for clams and getting dodged by passing boats. The cooler is tethered to a surfboard, in case you were wondering. This was in 2009 but I remember almost getting run over by the “Judith M” tourism boat like it happened this morning.
November 20. This sweet record player-inside-of-a-suitcase that my friends Susan and Kara gave me for my birthday last year. Shown here also is the greatest Christmas album of all time: the original “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” tv special soundtrack, found at Sal’s Army for two bucks!
November 21. Susan and Kara! Here we are on a cheesesteak run in Atlantic City during Susan’s birthday weekend. These are my Chick Fil A-working, lawn-forking, Plaza Tapatia-eating bitches.
November 22. Via Ferrata. I am the speck in the pink raincoat in the middle of the bridge of death. Unfortunately this Via Ferrata has changed hands and become super expensive, but I’ll never forget the way our group challenged ourselves to climb that course and how we all succeeded and celebrated together. Via Ferrata means “iron way,” and this course is literally a series of rungs and rope bridges winding around a mountain in Nelson Rocks, WV. How come every time I do something terrifying, I am in West Virginia?
November 23. I had the most amazing birthday party today! Lots of people turned out, and I debuted my new fire pit. As you can see here, the fire was about six feet tall and sideways.
November 24. Oh, Photoshop. Many people use Photoshop to perpetuate a standard of unattainable beauty. However, my favorite use of Photoshop is to restore old family photos and to correct documents where other people have misspelled my name.
November 25. Today is Monday. Thankfully, like all Mondays before it, it presumably will end.
November 26. This is overdue, but I am very, very, extremely glad that the finale of Breaking Bad did not suck. It would have ruined my year and probably my boyfriend Marc’s, as well.
November 27. Today I got to leave work early, travel to my parents’ house and have birthday part 2 with friends and family. Everything about today was awesome.
November 28. Happy Thanksgiving! My aunt and uncle deep fried the turkey again this year. YES.
November 29. My pet Uromastyx, Liz Lemon.
November 30. Today I am glad that I got to spend some time with my grandmother, Betty. We hit all of the hot spots around town: Denny’s, Hobby Lobby and the mall. Here’s a picture of Betty chillin with my grandfather in the 70’s. Rent is due tomorrow and I spent all my money on Hobbit-themed breakfasts for us at Denny’s, but that’s the life of an OG.